By Garry Messick
eDiets Contributor
One of the things that distinguishes the pop music of our grandparents from the post-rock and roll pop music we grew up with is the fact that all the Sinatras, Bing Crosbys, Andrews Sisters and the like used to E-NUN-CI-ATE when they sang. There was no mistaking the words to "My Funny Valentine" when Tony Bennett performed it. But for better or worse, with the transition to rock, the emphasis shifted to raw emotion over nuanced crooning, and pretty soon whatever the heck people were singing on the radio was anybody's guess.
The classic early example is 1963's "Louie Louie" by the Kingsmen. A few words are discernible, but in terms of what the ear hears, the first verse can be rendered as follows:
Louie, Louie, oh baby
Get a way da low.
Yah yah yah yah yah
Louie, Louie, woah baby
me gonna bo
Ah yah yah yah yah
After that, much of the tune is sung so mush-mouthed that it can barely be represented phonetically. Some say it's a result of releasing what was meant as a rehearsal run-through and braces on the lead singer's teeth. The best I can do is:
A fah, a fonah, a bah foh ba ga
But that's an extreme case. Much more common are tunes that are largely understandable, but with key phrases that can be easily misconstrued, sometimes in very amusing ways. Let's take a look at some of the best examples...
"Purple Haze" by Jimi Hendrix
Real lyric: 'Scuse me while I kiss the sky
Commonly misheard as: 'Scuse me while I kiss this guy
(This is the classic misheard lyric, so I got it out of the way first. The list wouldn't be complete
without it.)
"Beast of Burden" by the Rolling Stones
Real lyric: I'll never be your beast of burden
Misheard as: I'll never leave your pizza burning
(Mick's heartfelt promise to Jerry Hall, a frozen pizza aficionado, no doubt. Moving, to be sure.
Unfortunately, he didn't promise not to toss her aside eventually like a worn-out toothbrush, though.)
"Born a Rebel" by Tom Petty
Real Lyric: Hey, hey, hey, I was born a rebel
Misheard as: Hey, hey, hey, I was Barney Rubble
(Barney Rubble was Fred Flintstone's sidekick, in case you need reminding.)
"Like a Virgin" by Madonna
Real lyric: Like a virgin, touched for the very first time
Misheard as: Like a virgin, touched for the 31st time
(Doesn't the misheard version seem more appropriate? This is Madonna we're talking about, after all.)
"Little Red Corvette" by Prince
Real lyric: Little red Corvette
Misheard as: Pay the rent, Claudette
(Prince hasn't needed anyone else to pay his rent from at least since this song came out. More's the irony.)
"Mrs. Robinson" by Simon and Garfunkel
Real lyric: Hide it in a hiding place where no one ever goes/put it in the pantry with your cupcakes
Misheard as: Hide it in a hiding place where no one ever goes/put it in your pants between your cupcakes
(It's good to know I'm not the only one who stores snacks in his trousers to keep them handy, not to mention warm and moist!)
"Lady Marmalade" by Christina Aguilera (or the Pointer Sisters)
Real lyric: Voulez vous coucher avec moi ce soir?
Misheard as: Woolly bear could share a Big Mac, for sure!
(French and pop music just don't mix.)
"You're the One that I Want" by John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John
Real lyric: I've got chills, they're multiplyin'/And I'm losing control
Misheard as: I've got shoes, they're made of plywood/And I'm losing my soles
(Grease may be the word, but apparently that's the only one we can be sure of.)
"Losing My Religion" by R.E.M.
Real lyric: That's me in the corner/That's me in the spotlight, losing my religion
Misheard as: That's me in the corner/That's me in the spotlight, losing my erection
(Why hasn't Cialis or Viagra picked up on this one for a commercial jingle yet?)
"Bad Moon Rising" by Creedence Clearwater Revival
Real lyric: Don't go out tonight, it's bound to take your life/There's a bad moon on the rise
Misheard as: Don't go out tonight, it's bound to take your life/There's a bathroom on the right
(You're laughing at the idea of a lethal lavatory? Check out any service station or convenience store restroom if you doubt such a thing is possible.)
"Bennie and the Jets" by Elton John
Real Lyric: She's got electric boots, a mohair suit
Misheard as: She's got electric boobs, her mom has, too
Have any other "sing-along wrong" lyrics to add to the list? Join in on the fun and fess up!
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 4:08:00 AM - 
said...
My elementary school aged daughter misheard lyrics by Randy Travis. The misheard lyrics could describe a lesbian relationship:
Original lyric: It's a love without end, amen.
Misheard as: It's a love without any men.
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 6:56:00 AM - 
Norman said...
Another is Judy in disguise, with glasses miss heard as Judy in the skies with acid
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 7:32:00 AM - Lisa said...
Van Halen's song - "Panama" always sounded like "Hey, Mo" to me. I thought they were 3 stooges fans or something.
Lisa
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 7:37:00 AM - Lisa said...
Another one is "Caribbean Queen". I know the Arctic version - "Caribou Queen". It really does sound like that but it doesn't bring a sexy image to mind.
Lisa
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 8:12:00 AM - said...
Just a correction: Lady Marmalade was recorded by Labelle, not the Pointers Sisters. The post should read: Lady Marmalade by Labelle (or Christina Aguilera.) Labelle did it first!
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 9:12:00 AM - said...
I'm not sure who sings it, but it's:
Real lyrics: "Every time you go away, you take a piece of me with you."
Heard as: "Every time you go away, you take a piece of meat with you."
(Gonna be an empty refrigerator before long!)
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 10:26:00 AM - tysmomme said...
I love the song "White Flag" by Dido. Used to think it said, "I will not poke my eyes out and surrender"...
What it actually says is "I will not put my hands up and surrender". Too funny.
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 11:15:00 AM - said...
My best friend and I used to ride our bikes around town singing "Pea Brain! Savana loves me..." when we were in Junior High. Listen to Alana Loves Me by Kim Mitchell and you'll see.
I've hear someone else sing it as "Heat Wave!" Very funny...
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 11:17:00 AM - said...
MAROON 5 SONG "SHE WILL BE LOVED" I KNOW WHERE U HIDE ALONE IN YOUR CAR. MY DAUGHTER THOUGHT IT WAS I KNOW WHERE U HIDE BOLOGNA IN YOUR CAR!
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 11:40:00 AM - said...
My sister misheard the lyrics to "Reflections of" by The Supremes. My mom was not happy to happy to hear a 4-year old belting out, "Refreshing blood, the way life used to be."
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 11:51:00 AM - said...
When I was little I always thought Garth Brooks' The River said
Will the Lord ask my cat if I can make it through them all
original: with the lord as my captain i can make it through them all.
Also it took much convincing to get me to quit thinking that the word "minnow" wasn't in the ABC's
"L M N O"
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 12:54:00 PM - said...
My two favorites, which I will never sing correctly again, are
1.) Elton John's Tiny Dancer: "Hold me closer, Tony Danza/ count the head lice on the highway"
2.) and Whitney Houston's Saving All My Love For You: "Shaving off my muff for you"
In this modern world, it's more plausible than the original.
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 1:28:00 PM - Karen said...
I used to think the lyrics for "Big Ole Jet Airliner" were "Big ole Jed and Lionel."
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 4:01:00 PM - said...
There's a song where the original line is "only the lonely can play" I thought it said " only the lonely get laid".
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 5:43:00 PM - said...
An old roomate used to think that Madonna's "Last night I dreamt of San Pedro" was "Last night I dreamt of some bagels"
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 5:56:00 PM - Lisa said...
The song "Girl put your records On" Original: "Sapphire and faded jeans" Misheard as "Sapphire and feta cheese"
Lisa
Comment: Monday, April 28, 2008 10:43:00 PM - said...
I used to think that Manfred Mann's song Blinded By The Light was saying: Blinded by the light, wrapped up like a douche, another runner in the night
rather than:
Blinded by the light, revved up like a deuce, another runner in the night
Comment: Thursday, May 08, 2008 7:42:00 AM - said...
Hearts song, "Somebody to Love" was picked up by our three-year-old son as "Some bunny to love".
Comment: Thursday, May 08, 2008 12:27:00 PM - NLJ said...
How about Huey Lewis & The News, "I want a new truck"?
Comment: Friday, May 09, 2008 8:07:00 PM - said...
My favorite will always be that a friend of mine used to think the words to "Guantanamera" said: Once in a meadow, I saw a one ton tomato - one ton tomato - I saw a one ton tomato. Now that is priceless!
Comment: Tuesday, May 13, 2008 9:00:00 AM - said...
I thought The Who's "Who Are You" was "Newwwww Orleans, ooh ooh, ooh ooh" (of course, I grew up in New Orleans, so it was an easy mistake)
Comment: Tuesday, May 13, 2008 9:01:00 AM - said...
My sister thought the Eurythmics were singing "Here comes the rain again, falling on my head like a memory, falling on my head LIKE A MULE IN MOTION" instead of LIKE A NEW EMOTION.
kingsley
Comment: Tuesday, May 13, 2008 1:12:00 PM - said...
I alwys thought the lyrics in the song Panama was " Had enough".
Oops.
Comment: Wednesday, May 14, 2008 9:03:00 AM - said...
My nephew thought that the song "every road has it turns" said "every rose has it thorns"
Comment: Saturday, July 05, 2008 11:05:00 AM - NSG said...
When I was a little girl - Kenny Rogers song "Lucille" was popular - this is how I sang it (my dad used to have me sing it for his friends!)
"You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille....with 400 children that crap in the fields..."
The real lyrics are: "You picked a fine time to leave me Lucille, with 4 hungry children and crops in the field"...
That still makes me laugh!
:)
Comment: Tuesday, July 29, 2008 2:04:00 PM - said...
Okay so for so long, i was confused with the lyrics from Nelly's "Hot In Here"
What i thought, "I've got a friend with a whole in her face, man"
The original lyrics are, "I've got a friend with a pool in her basement"
lmao.
Comment: Saturday, August 09, 2008 7:57:00 PM - said...
The song "Girl put your records On" Original: "Sapphire and faded jeans" Misheard as "Sci-fi invader jeans"
Comment: Saturday, August 16, 2008 3:25:00 PM - acs said...
Back to Kim Mitchell's song - "Alana Loves Me" for a moment; I overheard it being mis-sung as "Free Way, a ban on loving" (which isn't a bad idea while driving!)
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